Sunday, December 4, 2011


Would you prefer to fit in? Would you prefer to stand out? These are questions that one must ponder on a daily basis. Anyone (most everyone) who interacts socially or even in a professional setting, must make a decision regarding the position they want to place themselves in. Each direction will offer possibilities of positive outcomes, as well as possible drawbacks. This is something I often feel conflicted about. My first inclination would be to stand out, because I simply repel the idea of being a carbon copy of anyone else. I have never liked the idea of mimicking someone, borrowing their style, doing what someone else does, etc... I've never been one to follow something or someone just because it was what everyone else was doing. I have never had a problem with peer pressure, because once I am decided about something, I cannot be swayed. So naturally, I would consider myself a person who stands out as unique, singular and steadfast. However, from my perspective there are two problems with the "standing out" scenario. Firstly, don't really like being in the spotlight. I don't like 'all eyes on me'. {The only exception, is with regards to my writing. Writers are said to have big egos, so I suppose I go into transformer mode when I put my writer's hat on!} The second problem with standing out, is that you may quite literally be left standing OUT. It can be quite a solitary experience at times. Luckily for me, at least 80% of the time, I don't mind being a loner. I'd even consider myself somewhat of a hermit at times. (Hermitage of course, being immensely difficult when you are also the mother of three children, so this is rare.) Fitting in could be so much easier, I'd imagine. Fitting in, you'd probably have a thrilling social life. You'd probably be surrounded by many people who share similar interests. You'd probably be 'snug as a bug in a rug'. I cannot speak from the perspective of a person who has ever fit into anything, with one exception. The niches I have found, have always been with my fellow poets and writers. We speak a language, come from a place full of misfits, vagabonds, rebels, loners, fire-starters, trail-blazers, optimists and dreamers -all of which I relate to.
It is a personal choice. It is a decision that must be made. Fit in or stand out. Find your comfy place. And be all that you can be when you do. And as I always say, "Be the best version of yourself."