Writing through it...

My mentor and fellow writer, Alicia Anabel, took some time to workshop with me. We worked through my writers block. What did I realize? I write; it's just what I do. Sometimes I write from my own perspective, my feelings. But, a lot of times I try to put myself in the shoes of others and write from how they may be feeling. Or, I write from my experiences and how they affect and inspire me. My block was writing from MY pain. Writing from and through a painful feeling or experience leaves one incredibly vulnerable. It's like having a huge gash and leaving it open, susceptible to all kinds of mess. I tend to close the painful things off, not open them, not allow any mess in. It always heals, but it also always leaves a scar.

Today, I wrote a poem about deployment. My soldier is preparing to deploy to a not-so-friendly area, and I am not one bit excited about that. He's leaving, I'm staying. Each aspect of the transition carries stressful experiences. I decided to write through it, or at least scratch the surface of what I am feeling. A comfort in the whole matter is knowing that for each line I type, I KNOW there is some other military spouse out there who is feeling the very same way. It is a thread that weaves us all together, regardless of race, religion or region. So I write for myself, to purge and heal. I also write for my fellow spouses who feel these same things, but maybe cannot put it into words.

~LPS~

Instant Gratification

I like things like the quarter machines, where you put a quarter in, turn the dial and out comes a prize or gumball or whatever. Instantly, bam! There it is! I love that! But of course, most of real life is not like a quarter machine. It takes a grand amount of patience sometimes. Tying this into my writing...I'm blocked. Actually, it feels more like stalled. Perhaps it's even sidetracked. There is a lot going on in my life. That is NO excuse. I need to learn how to manage my time and focus more clearly. I want to write, so I want it to come out NOW! The words, the stanzas, the rhymes, but they won't. Here is one thing that I have learned though, through the years. I cannot will the words. They come when they are ready to come, when the words are clear. This is true in every day life as well. When we obsess over wanting things that we don't have at the moment, it makes all of things we DO have pale in comparison. What is meant to be ours will make its arrival into our pocket of the universe when it is our time to receive it.

~LPS~

Not all Hearts & Flowers, USA!

Let's get it straight from the first sentence. I am a VERY proud military wife, proud of my soldier, happy to be an American family supporting our service member. I LOVE what the military stands for and am patriotic. Just to be clear, I am not bashing the military in any way! Now that I got that off my chest...

It is my opinion that the voice of the military spouse is not being heard on many issues. People hear that it's hard for us to go through deployments, and it is. People watch shows like Army Wives (decent show) which does portray some of the issues, but it is not the REALITY of how we live, what we go through, our daily struggles. WE have many concerns. The public hears about the things that are affecting the soldiers. Who is telling our story, how those very same issues affect the spouses?? This is where I come in! I am quite passionate about the things that affect military spouses and families, and I intend to work on raising our voice!

This is an effort in steps. I am currently gathering opinions of other military spouses to share our thoughts. If you are a military spouse interested in sharing your thoughts, please contact me. I am looking forward to this project!

~LPS

A mother's protective instinct...

I was going to write about birds this morning. I had a bird chirping at me, getting my attention. Then I read a status of someone on my Facebook page. She'd shared that her son was ill, someone commented something to the effect of "how could she let that happen", and she went OFF on him! I applaud her for that, and told her so. There is very little that can hold a candle to the might of a mother's instinct to protect and care for her children. I was told by my mother-in-law, after expressing how much I looooooved her son, that I wouldn't truly know what love was until I had a child. Three years later, I gave birth to my first child and found that she was absolutely correct! As soon as a child is born, that child that has either grown from our own womb or that child that one was blessed enough to have found her, and that she adopts, we change. A deep love manifests and courses through our veins, mind & body & soul, we LOVE this child and want nothing more than to see it thrive happily and live healthy. We will fiercely protect that child, even if it is not in our nature to be aggressive. We would run into a burning building, jump in front of a car, dive into an ocean, anything it would take (even if it risks our own lives) to ensure that child is safe and well. I am not naturally aggressive or argumentative. That changes when it comes to my children. I advocate for them, I stand up for them and I make them feel protected. To say to any mother, even in a casual or joking manner, that she allowed some harm, even in the smallest degree, will activate a ferocious maternal protective instinct. Keep in mind this is not only a human trait. Many species in the animal kingdom share these instincts. Motherhood is the most challenging and most rewarding job (gift) a woman will ever undertake. Speaking for myself, it's is the most precious gift I have ever received. Thank you God!

~LPS~

It was there all along~

I knew I wanted to open my mind to writing something today. For me, that means waiting. It's kind of like knowing someone is going to call, but they didn't tell you exactly what time. I didn't have to wait very long and it was while I was doing the morning dishes. I have three children so every morning there are usually three cups, three bowls/plates and three utensils to wash from breakfast. (I like the #3, btw.) This morning, there was a fourth cup. These particular cups came in a set of four, but I usually only see 3, as I said. {I'm guessing hubby drank something before PT.} Anyway, as I washed them, I said to myself, "Where'd this fourth cup come from?" Then I answered myself, "It was there all along, I just never used it." {And yes, I do converse with myself in this way regularly. P.S. I wasn't speaking aloud.} So this got me thinking.

We all posess skills, talents, gifts, traits, etc., that are within us that we do not use or tap into. When one lacks confidence, it is not because they truly lack it in the sense of absence, they just have not made the choice to exercise it, for example. We are all masses of energy, wonder and unlimited potential! How energized we become, how wonderous we turn out and how much of our potential we reach is in OUR hands. The Creator (whichever name you choose, for me it's God) did not put a cap on our potential. What a gift! Just to know that if I want something, if I dream of something (as I often do), I DO have the power to make it reality because the tools to the pathways of success are built right into me! I tell my children all the time, usually when they are being unruly and tell me they can't stop misbehaving, that we, as human beings were given great power. We can control our minds and bodies. We COULD have been created as robots, but instead we were given emotions and free will, and it is that which allows us to decide for ourselves how we will behave/act. It is a great responsibility, but also a powerful gift. {They like that part.}


So today I challenge you to tap into your own ability and power. For the things that you desire, want to achieve, look within yourself to find the pathway. Reflect inwardly on all those things that have been there all along. They await your beckon.

~LPS~

Texas, I have arrived!

After a grueling trip (LONG ride, our car completely fell apart in TN, we had to get Red Cross to help us get a tow and a hotel room, had to junk our car and get a rental from an airport an hour and a half way), we FINALLY made it to TX. The best part was as all of this insanity was happening to us, we kept strong as a family and none of us had a nervous breakdown. I try to be thankful of all of the good that we have. Even though it is a difficult patch, we are all being optimistic and upbeat. We have a home, we have our things and we are working on getting a car. The kids are in school and I've even had a chance to meet a group of really friendly and cool wives. Here are my initial observations about Texas:
#1 ~It's HOTTTTTT!
#2 There are huge, icky crickets out here.
#3 ~The walk, in total to & from school to take my kids will total about 4 miles daily!
#4 ~This installation is HUGE!
#5 ~People really DO wear cowboy boots on a regular basis out here!

Still so much to learn, so many people to meet, places to visit and things to do! Forwarrrrd, MARCH!

~LPS~

Bitty ponytail, Spare Change & Cleaning persons

Jobs...endless options! Meaning, you can seek out jobs in any field provided that you are qualified. I want to take this moment to say how much I appreciate all of the people in the world who are OCD about cleaning. These are the people who excel and enjoy the job of being a cleaning person. I am totally serious too! As I mentioned, I'm moving. I have spent the past week, scrubbing, bleaching, scraping, wiping, washing rinsing....and I'm tired and my fingers are peeling from Clorox & all the other cleaning products. (Even though I love the smell of cleaning supplies like Clorox, Windex & Pine Sol!) This is another opportunity to state how much I appreciate my husband. Even with all the cleaning I have done, there is still a lot to be done!! So my hubby has agreed to hire cleaning people to clean the house to clear for our move!! Woot-woot!! I have done so much already so it's pretty much easy, but I almost teared up at the thought of cleaning blinds again!! So that makes me a really happy camper! Oddly enough, I DO have several OCD tendencies, but they mostly stem from my obsession with order and doing things "just right". About my ponytail...I HAVE ONE. It's a little itty bitty one, but it fits in a pony tail holder!! I am growing my hair out. I've considered getting extensions in, but they are SO expensive. I'll have to see if I can get a good deal!! It would be a change. Speaking of change....I am saving all of the loose change and singles I am finding around the house! I can't wait to see how much I gather! I told the kids we'd have a pizza party with the $ we collect!!